OK….Christmas is finally over, although all the package delivery bullshit side of it will continue I’m sure, as we take the next few weeks to deal with everything that hit the fan the past month…but enough talking shop. I’m glad it’s over, seems that this year was the worst for me, in that the feeling of obligation greatly outweighed the feeling of “oh boy it’s Christmas!”…in fact, I can safely say that feeling never touched me once. I’m not a grinch, but this year it was all work and no play for me.

Something I’ve always meant to do, and have finally done, is link up the namesake for this blog….click on the title and prepared to be amazed….or at least happy you get a free song out of it. One of the best Canadian bands 2/3s of you have never heard of before. Enjoy.

And speaking of waiting, it seems as if my life tries to kick-start something new every week or so, but then it never pans out….note to the universe….this does NOT count as something new…try harder next time.

Resolutions for the new year? I’ll finally get that new tattoo….still need a design though that I can live with….I’m in desperate need of that weight bench I wanted, if only to strengthen my back and not have to pop pills every night after work….those two can be my Xmas presents to myself….also, I think I’ll take this year to actually see how far, even if only theoretically, I can go in the company. Also, I will do a better job of letting go of all the old baggage that still follows me around…I mean, I’m sure it’ll always be there, and one person in particular will always forever be there in the back of my mind, but as much as possible it all needs to be junked so I can have room for new things.

Now, I’d do a year in review, but to be fair, I haven’t done much this year except work and try not to be bothered by things that never worked out…which I accomplished by working so much haha…I guess another resolution could be to play a bit harder….I mean, I have two weeks off in June, why not actually plan something, even if it’s only to drive myself to BC for the experience? Hell, there’s my vacation right there…

Peace out.

Why the hell am I awake at 4:21 AM? is it to smoke some dope…probably not (lame 420 reference woot woot)….I watched 6 new episodes of South Park since coming home, was all set to pass out, and now here I am on itunes blogging…no Lee, you’re doing things backwards again…

Too much energy I suspect….something about going to work and burning myself out…brings out the overtired and amped on a second wind in me.

Maybe I’m amped on this weird feeling like the past is finally where it fucking belongs for once? I saw the past today on the way to work, and oddly enough, felt fine with it….I may have played “what if?” for a second, but otherwise….fine….odd…yeah…..that, and something someone said at work tonight regarding what I could do with the company, have me feeling….optimistic? Yeah, guess that’s what I’m looking for….fuck….feels weird, been so long since I did anything else but just go through day-to-day

Ew….this blog just took a turn for the emo….crybaby….ok, we need to up the cool factor….hmmm cool, oh I know, another song for ALL my readers (edit: a song for Danielle I mean)…..hmmm…HA! I know….oh wait, you already have that song, since you recommended it….crap…ok, compromise time, I’ll add two…..

Click the titles now for the link to Desert Sessions – I Wanna Make It Wit Chu, and another track off the newest Ryan and the Cardinals – Blue Hotel.

….oh and yes, I just learned how to do that…oh lovely, it’s now 4:46AM……enjoy the songs.

EDIT It’s 5:05AM, and I just listened to Ryan Adams – Meadowlake Street. So here I am sharing it with the rest of you….listen to it with headphones, really loud.

OK bedtime for real.

Question.

How do people do it? I mean, some people make the whole growing up thing look so easy…..find a career, get a lasting relationship, build a home….etc, etc. Are they just settling? Is that what I’m missing? I hope so, or else I’m way too anti-social to play along anymore.

Anyway….don’t mind me, just frustrated a bit is all…..seems I keep making the same mistake, but since I refuse to settle, I guess I’ll continue to keep making that mistake.

Now just to learn to do so happily.

Adios.

*Edit* I’ve added a song, because I felt guilty I’ve been lax in doing so lately….click the link to get a taste of the new Ryan Adams and the Cardinals EP…..it’s also a song I find fucking fantastic…..think I like the original version better though..

Welcome to the snowpocalypse…..aka outdoors….I’m waiting to wake up enough to dig my car out and go to work. Please note I also had to dig my car in when I got home last night….point is, I’ve been digging a lot of snow….and working OT….fun, fun.

What else is new? Well, I made my mom happy by driving 8 hours on the weekend to surprise her…and got a turkey dinner out of it….makes up for my lack of a Thanksgiving I guess.

Personal life? It’s…well….I’m not sure yet….there are some promising things happening, also some annoying bullshit things that I need to take care of, so basically I’m the same as everyone else.

Relationship-wise…well “potential” relationship-wise I’m in a good place though….baggage is finally gone…I purposely left it at the airport. Feels good.

OK, time to go shovel snow and tear my back apart.